Christine and I started by picking up our rental car, Walter (took the upgrade to the luxury car and it's a good thing because it's stuffed!).
Super Grover strapped himself in and put on his driving hat (part of the road trip rules was everyone has to have a driving hat) and we were off to pick up Mom.
Now the plan was we would call Mom when we left Quincy and her and dad would leave Maine and we'd all meet in Danvers. We called mom and said we left and she said 'oh, I guess I better pack'. Oh boy! So Christine and I get to Danvers and call to say we are there and mom says they're not even out of Eliot Maine yet! So decision made Chris and I would drive up to the NH state liquor store and we'd meet there.
We finally all met up. After loading all moms stuff in the car, saying hi to Bentley, and going through the way we should drive down around Boston with dad (he said 495 would be less traffic but 95 would be faster still....obviously we go for speed regardless off traffic woes).
So Christine put on her driving hat and we were off.
We think Walter is an invisible car because everyone kept cutting us off like we weren't there.
Mom and I started playing Rubber Neckers. Super fun until you're trying to look over to the side and a stupid minivan keeps coming along side so you can't see if there's a weathervane on a house. Thought mom was going to pee herself when I yelled 'get out of the way you f@$:ING D:$;)/e'
Chris got us to Connecticut and it was my turn to drive so I put on my driving hat and off we went
So I still feel Connecticut traffic is the worst. It took hours to get thru. We did stop for gas. As I was filling up(wearing my driving hat) the guy filling up next to us looked at me oddly....not sure what his problem was.
So, of course, we hit NY at 4PM in the height of traffic so took forever to get through. Also didn't help that I missed 95 turning so hit 295. Ugh. We made it back to 95 (thanks to Margarita - our navigation) to sit in traffic; so have no fears.
I think the only thing making this fun is my awesome playlist of crap songs mom made us listen to as kids. Lots of Lionel Richie, Ann Murry Hall and Oates, Billy Joel, Doibie Brothers and Kenny Rogers. Amazingly (or maybe sadly), Chris and I still know most of the words.
I got us to New Jersey and Christine took over driving again. When they say expect severe delays in this state they really mean it. Trapped like rats on the NJ Turnpike. Super G took a look and was very sad.
To pass the time Super Grover and I started car dancing. Not only did this entertain us but the people in other cars enjoyed the show too. Sadly we realized Super G cannot do the Flashdance Maniac dance because his feet are glued together:-(. He also can't flip people the bird because he only has four fingers! I feel I must talk to someone at Hasbro about this.
Mom wanted me to call my nephew Kyle and ask if he was going to Maine this week. I called him at the pet shop he works at. I put on my deep voice and said I was Ramona who bought a bird from him 2 months ago and told him the bird died and asked if he would go to the birds funeral with me since he and Carlos (the birds name) were so close. He thought we were nuts.
The one redeeming quality about NJ is the gas stations. They do a great job cleaning the windshield and even offer to check the oil. Such service!
Super G got to watch the sunset over the Delaware Memorial Bridge.
I forced Chris to take a nap well mom say up front for a while and we got they DC.
And now Chris is driving....onto the southern states!
Things I've learned today:
1. Waze does not have a button to report there are a-holes driving on the road
2. While I have an awesomely incredible singing voice driving alone to work every day, it may not translate over when others are in the car....unsure why this is so...
3. Mom is not a good co-pilot....she's very nervous.
4. Mom is blind (or illiterate). Reads sign and says '20 miles to Portsmouth'. Chris' response: 'you mean Providence'.
5. Christine also has reading issues. Back of Megabus says "plus a reservation". Christine says "I thought that said piss your reservation". I'm getting nervous with these people driving.
6. Mom would rather sit in the backseat where she gets car sick than be in the passenger seat when Christine's driving
7. I have my fathers temper (not sure when I adopted that)
8. No matter how loud you sing, if you sing the wrong words, they're still wrong
9. If we get a fight on this trip, with mom and Chris' medical history, it's going to be up to Super Grover and Me to take care of things
10. No matter what time if day, no matter what time of year, New Jersey just smells. There, I said it.
Quote of the day: mom saying "I think I was a redneck in my former life" while listening to John Denver
